For most of us, actually setting foot on the field at a major league baseball stadium is a pipedream. Except for the random concert, or photo day at the park, most of us are confined to the seating areas.

Two weeks ago, I had the chance to roam freely around ATT Park in San Francisco, during a stop on Kenny Chesney's Poets and Pirates Tour. 

Armed with an all-access laminate and a plan, I got to the park around noon. I entered the stadium through the gate by the left field foul pole, and there it was ... a Major League stadium at my disposal. 

I walked the length of the warning track to the stage, deciding that both the warning track and the fence look a lot smaller on TV. Then, after asking directions to the production office, I made my way down down the dugout steps, through a tunnel, up more steps nd behold ... the visitors clubhouse. At the time I thought I was in the Giants clubhouse, as it was on the first base side. I did not find out until much later that the Giants dugout in on the third base side.

I entered the clubhouse, said my helloes, and couldn't help but notice a pair of cushy, black leather couches in the corner. During my tour of the outside of the park, I hardly saw anything that would tie the stadium to Bonds, but maybe the couches were leftover.

I was also able to take in the clubhouse rules posting -- how did you miss that one Pete? Lots of rules and regs regarding just about everything.After securing passes for friends coming later, it was up to the pressbox level. Quite the view, I must saw -- much like the view the Dodgers' Rick Monday described last night from the pressbox at GABP of Kentucky.

I then headed down to the Lexus Club seats. You know the ones that are actually below the playing field. Didn't get that at all. But I did get the spiel about entering the field during a game by a very nice older lady.

"Why would you want to do that. That's just stupid." Of course, that day was different. But San Francisco's finest gave me the facts. Enter the playing filed at ATT willingly and you get: ejected, arrested, jailed and fined $1,000. No pleas, no barters, that's straight up. As far as falling on to the field trying to catch a foul, if you \gtet right back into the seats, they'll scold you and that's about it.

After that trek, I went and sat in the dugout -- which they turned into a bar for the day, roamed the halls to the Giants clubhouse and training room. Basically covered every inch of space at ATT.

And did you know:

The home plates for the bullpens at ATT are just painted on the warning track?

That the warning track on the outfield in dirt, but the infield warning track is synthetic?

I actually used the same toilet (which is located less than 10 feet from the dugout) that home run champ and cheater Barry Bonds used?

And that stadium plumbing is the worst?

When I told my friend who works for Kenny that I was coming, she had me figured out.

"You're not coming for the show, you just want to run amok in a baseball stadium and not get stopped."

Who doesn't?

On my way to the game tonight I realized that I had bought tickets that were in the corner by the Braves dugout. Contemplated buying Diamond Seats (usually spend $100 on food and adult beverages anyway). 

Instead, I opted for a scout seat (22, B,1). Boy was I glad. Usually I don't concern myself with the Diamond Seats, except to check out the servers. But tonight, being tow rows back, I got the chance to observe just how the "fans" that occupy seats behave.

The fun started right away. Two, let's just say not quite fully dressed young ladies, sampled nearly every seat . They were up and moving after nearly every pitch. Another pair of Kentucky girls (you just know), were just as active, getting up after nearly a few pitches and disappearing into to lower reaches of the Diamond Club, only to reappear, fully loaded, in another section.

Now if there is one thing that bothers me, it's the genius that has to get up every couple of outs and goes who knows where. Only to come back during a meaningful plate appearance.

Anyway, back to the Diamond Club. It seems that it;s just a poser-fest, people wanting to be seen, holding their phone to their ear and waving to God knows who. And it's nearly everyone in the section. You can tell. They're the one that go to the bar when it's first and second in the bottom of the 11th inning tied at 2-2. Don't they have servers? Yes they do, I've already mentioned them.

But the coup de grace, it the loud, fat guy. Chris Farley's dead, and this guy wants to replace him. He's up after every pitch, yelling, high-fiving and belittling the guy with Francouer jersey. He stands more than he sits, spends more time out of the row than in, and in what I thought was the crown jewel, he does a shot, with another "fan" during the bottom of the ninth. It was then, finally, one of the security guys had a chat with him. If I paying $230 to sit behind this guy, I saying it after the first out.

And just for the record, most of them were gone by the time the game ended.

They should require two tests before issuing Diamond Level Seats tickets -- a baseball IQ test and a Brethalyzer.

Now I've sat in the Diamond Club seats before, and the worst thing I had to deal with was the guy with the cell phone waving to the entire stadium. Every inning.

I'll tell you though, free beer and hot dogs and nachos good. The pre-game buffett, not so good. I live in the land of the buffet, and the Diamond club buffet ranks even behind Circus Circus. But it does rank ahead of the Buffet at the Lexus Club at PNC Park. Where legend has it I actually asked Wayne Krivskey for my money back.

 Not a lot of energy at the GABP last night. Reds looked uninspired, lazy.

Not running out grounders, poor base running, errors. And Harang looked beat. I understand he volunteered to pitch in Sunday's 18-inning game, but Dusty should've said no. Not a chance.

Instead, he threw some 80 pitches. Last night, he threw 73 and was ineffective. Should have let Affeldt start, let Harang go Sunday vs, the Braves

Like some of the changes at the ballpark, unfortunately, there were some things that didn't change. Wednesday night I was lucky. Section 23 was devoid of the loud-mouth, know-it-alls, drunks and kids.

Thursday night, not so lucky. Guy behind me had three very young kids. Lady beside me spilled everything she touched, and the piece de resistance, the very drunk lady in front of me who -- true to form -- stood up and waved and yelled (all the while on her cellphone) to her friends who were not as "lucky" as her. I tried to bribe the server not to bring her anymore, but that was a lost cause.

Hopefully the Reds will rebound against the Braves, whose record is the exact opposite at 29-25. 

Tough loss for the Reds. Took the day off from Cher, drove at a nice leisurely pace from Vegas to Chavez Ravine -- 85 all the way until the parking lot that is the 10 Freeway.

Got to Dodger Stadium about 5:30. Here's a tip for anyone driving to the Stadium who wants to get out quick. tell the parking guy you are just going to buy stuff at the Top of the Park Store. You literally park 100 feet from the turnstiles for the upper deck. You park there, show your ticket to get into the store, and viola, you're in. After the game, you are literally back on Sunset in less than 10 minutes.

So got to the Stadium about 5:30, bought stuff for nephews, put it back in the car. Went to my seat -- top row of the Stadium dead center. Ten bucks.

I think the Dodgers charge $500-$650 for seats in the Dugout Club, but sitting at the top of the park is one of the best views in baseball. The San Gabriels behind the outfield fence, the Police Academy nearby, spectacular views of downtown.

Okay that was the good. The bad ... a disappointing loss to the Dodgers. I should have known, as the well never seem to well at Dodger Stadium when I am one of the paid attendees. I think I've only witnessed two Cincinnati wins in all my years of going to the Stadium.

Dunn jacked another homer, Arroyo pitched decently -- could've  sworn I saw him later at the Standard Hotel Lounge Downtown after the game.  Might've been him, lots of LA-type women around him.

Tough errors by Hairston and Janish. But hey, that's baseball. The Reds could have easily won their seventh in a row, but at least it was a decent game, compared to some of the more recent West Coast trips.

Can't make the game tonight, Cher's back on stage. In case you're interested, she plays Tuesday, Wednesday, Saturday and Sunday at the Colosseum at Caesars Palace. You can get a pair of tickets for the price of one seat in the Dugout Club.

Maybe my absence will be felt in the form of a Reds' win. But with Belisle and his 1-3,  7.45 ERA on the mound, it will take another couple of Dunn homers, Griffey's 598th and maybe Janish's first. The good thing is that the cable feed at Caesars has FSN, so I might get to watch.