SLOW DAY. SUMMER IS NEVER GONNA GET HERE. READ THIS.
Brilliant idea to stay up until 1:30 watching the Reds. Here's some stuff on my mind, at least stuff on my mind I'm allowed to put on my blog....
-Why do the employees at SportClips dress like health teachers?
-Has anyone ever gone "cougar hunting" at the Crossbow?
-Right now, I'm watching the Cast of "Indiana Jones" on "TRL." Harrison Ford looks about as comfortable on that set as Marvin Lewis at a clock management seminar.
-Before "TRL," I actually sat through most of a two hour ESPN show on the NBA Draft Lottery. Making me perhaps the most pathetic man ever. Two hours for not even a non-game, but a non-draft!
-Some have asked. If the Knicks win, which they won't, Derrick Rose.
-If you're not a college professor, you should not use the word "existential" in a sentence.
-MTV is currently airing a reality show about a high school newspaper. A ****ing newspaper. I say this as someone who actually wrote three articles for the Scott High School newspaper, but hasn't MTV bottomed out when its run out of cool kids to follow? Is the band next? FFA? Why not a reality show about detention? In-house? Saturday school? Shop class? Aren't any of those far more interesting than a damn school paper?
-I haven't watched a ton of "SNL" this year, but I caught Saturday's which was pretty damn good, if only for this. Anyway, I like this new cast member.
-On the blog over the next couple of weeks, The Top 153 (novel idea, I pick 153 hot women and put pictures of them together, video highlights of the All You Can Eat Section, Gas saving tips, and The Skinny Beard Project. I could actually be working on all those right now, but I don't feel like it.
-There's a guy I know in the radio business who's always talking about being linear. I have no idea what that means. But everytime I hear him use that word, I think of this.
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WE CAN'T HAVE A PARADE FOR THE CYLCONES But in San Francisco, they can have this. Sad.
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THIS GUY WAS OFFERED TWO CHOICES A) Be a Bengals fan for life. B) This.
RANDOM THOUGHT Everyone's all excited about the fact that Charles Barkley isn't gonna gamble anymore. Wouldn't it be more exciting if he announced that he's gonna stop talking?
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YOU KNOW WHAT I NEED MORE OF? People looking over my shoulder while I work on this blog..
GOD I LOVE HORSE RACING From this past weekend's Preakness. Ironclad lock of the century: I will be attending both the Derby and the Preakness in 2009.
I know the argument is that you have to have some way of getting the concession stand staffed. My question would be this, have you ever eaten anything from a concession stand at a little league game? The food is brutal. I'd rather eat at a Long John Silver's which is really saying a lot. Do we actually have to have concession stand? Can the games continue without stale hotdogs and FUNachos? (Thanks to the planet's greatest website)
When Kevin Furlong received an e-mail from an employee of the Detroit Lions ticket office, he did a double take.
"F--- 'em until next year," it said.
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MY IDEA OF HELL ON EARTH A long car ride with this guy.
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GOLF FOR A CAUSE...EVEN IF IT'S NOT WORTHWHILE Join us for the first ever "Save the Webcam" golf outing. Save the Webcam is a non-profit group founded by me, aimed at raising funds so my blog can have a webcam. We only have one fundraiser and it's this Friday.
Details: Where: Golf Center at Kings Island "Bruin" Course (aka, "the easy one") When: 3pm, Friday Cost: $18.50 with a cart, $11.50 to walk
I am playing only nine holes, you're welcome to play 18, but I'll be ready for a cold one at the Courseview restaurant after nine. In addition, you can stuff your bags with beer, which I'm not allowed to buy.
There will be a prize, though I have no idea what it is, and I have no idea who we're gonna award it to. Best score. Funniest dresser. Worst golfer. No idea. Either a Lance McAlister show t-shirt or something from my house will be up for grabs.
As you know, no successful charity golf outing goes without a sponsor, so we're currently in the process of lining up corporate support. Potential sponsors can e-mail me.
Hope you can join us. If you plan of attending, or need more information, e-mail Mark Chalifoux, tournament organizer, and Save the Webcam fundraising chair.
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KNOW WHAT JAY BRUCE NEEDS MORE THAN A ROSTER SPOT? Apparently, a nickname.
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HERE'S AN INDUSTRY TERM FOR YOU: TOPICS -Soooo, the Reds are good now, huh? Seriously, what a weekend, what a week. Six good starts, Dunn heating up (4 "meaningless" homers in 4 games), some clutch hitting, coming off the mat a few times, some outstanding defense. A week ago, we were burying them, now what? -Do six straight wins make you think again about the moves we've debated for weeks? -In the history of life, has anyone ever had a better five day run than Paul Janish. If I had five days like Paul Janish had, I might seriously consider offing myself, simply because life couldn't get any better. -How scary is it that Edison Volquez is not anything close to being economic with his pitches, and wasn't sharp yesterday, yet he leads the Majors in ERA? -Please tell me you watched LeBron v. Pierce yesterday. -We're seriously gonna have to think about a Cyclones championship parade. Since the city of Cincinnati couldn't successfully put together a one car parade, is there a local community who wants to host our first championship celebration in 18 years?
SAVE THE WEBCAM! PLAY GOLF! Remember earlier this week when we had a web-cam? That was cool, huh? Well, the man took it away. So we're getting our own. Problem is, we need your help. As you know, the only successful method of fundraising in the tri-state are golf outings. So, we're having the "Save the Webcam" golf outing next Friday, May 23rd at a golf course to be named (details are being worked out). The proceeds will go toward the purchase of a new webcam for us. Figure mid afternoon. Be there, or the webcam is history. If you plan on attending, or for more information, e-mail Mark Chalifoux. Hope to see you there so you can help this important cause.
THE BEST THREE HOURS OF RADIO YOU'VE EVER HEARD Actually no, it'll be my show. Anyway, some stuff we'll get into.... -Guest...Eric Neel of ESPN.com's Page 2. On the Reds, Griffey, Dunn, Chris Paul, David West, and Jim Rome. -Junior played a pretty good prank on Josh Fogg the other night. Best prank/or thing you've done to mess with a co-worker. Yes, we've said we were going to do this before, but haven't. -Guest....Josh Sneed. Performing at Go Bananas this weekend, recording a new comedy CD. Admitted to me at the Reds game Wednesday night that he liked Jerrry McGuire. I almost left him there to watch Francisco Cordero blow the save by himself. -The Indians are coming! Yawn. Interleague play run it's course?
NEWS ANCHORS SINGING! My boys Tim and George at Kiss107 are commemorating (celebrating?) the conclusion of American Idol season 82 by putting together Cincinnati TV Newsperson Idol Ripoff. Pretty funny stuff from the folks at channels 5, 12, and 19.
The highlight of course is my favorite TV weather person Christie Dutton sticking out her tongue. I actually saw Christie at a Reds game (her seats were exponentially better than mine) and she's tremendous. Enjoy!
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IF YOU CAN'T PLAY IT, TALK ABOUT IT Career mantras for both me, and UC Football sideline reporter and play by play man extraordinaire Tommy Gelehrter, as we begin "Tommy and Mo's Great Sporting Adventures" on gobearcats.com. Episode one has us working out with the Bearcat baseball team.
Special thanks to coach Brian Cleary and the UC baseball players, who were awesome. By the way, the 'Cats are 33-19, and still hold out hopes for a Big East titles. They play three with West Virginia at Marge Schott stadium this weekend.
I WILL TALK. YOU WILL LISTEN. I HOPE. Here's just a smidge of some of the stuff we'll talk about on Thursday's mid-morning radio program... -Was Paul Janish's debut the greatest in the history of the Reds? Seriously, how cool was that? -This team has resembled a Major League outfit the last three days, flyballs and six run ninth innings not withstanding. Turning the corner or fool's gold? -The webcam seems popular. But it's in danger of going away. Other, far less innovative radio stations are trying to seize it. (No one on Homer by the way) We're gonna throw together a fundraiser to buy our show a webcam. -I love baseball, but the insistence of abiding by unwritten rules is silly and dumb. -Went to the Reds game (and yes, stayed) last night. Have you noticed an upgrade in the talent slinging hot dogs and beer? There's actually women. And some of them are actually attractive! -Holy crap, this woman is f'ing amazing.
-Someone used "opposite day" in casual conversation. Worst comeback ever? -How old is too old to call "shotgun?" How old is too old to care if you're sitting in the front seat? -You know what was enjoyable yesterday? Some NBA talk. Would love some more, though I didn't see Boston/Cleveland and saw only parts of LA/Utah.
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HERE'S A WOMAN WHO WOULDN'T GIVE ME THE TIME OF DAY Not exactly going out on a limb with that one. Anyway, this woman is retardedly hot. Sorry, I usually hate using that word, but I have no other way to describe her. Just check her gallery from my favorite website.
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IF YOU WEAR THIS, POLICE SHOULD BE ALLOWED TO SHOOT YOU I'm a big hat guy, thus I'm a big lids.com guy. Also a former Tri-County Mall Lids employee. Anyway, was preusing the site, looking for hats, when I found this...
That's right. Sesame Street hats. For adults. Seriously. Are there actually people consciously making the decision to not only purchase this, but wear it? Sadly, probably yes. More important, are there actually women saying "yes" to guys wearing this? Sadly, probably yes. We have indeed bottomed out as a society when grown men are wearing these around. When I start seeing this show up in rap videos, I'm selling my TV.
YES, YOU'VE SEEN THIS BEFORE A few months ago, Cincinnati Magazine came out with their Best Restaurants issue. I ripped it, and came up with my own. They took a portion of my original blog and put it in the letters to the editor section.
They also signed it....Mo Egger 1350 Homer, The Sports Animal.
Anyway, they linked to the list on their web exclusives page. Problem is, the list went away a long time ago, so I had to re-create it for people in Indian Hill who have never heard of me, 1530Homer, (or 1350Homer for that matter), or any of the places on my list.
If you're joining us via Cincinnati Magazine, welcome, and enjoy the list. My list is better than theirs, though you may have to bring the Navigator into parts of town you might not be familiar with and turn on the faucets in the bathroom by yourself.
If you come here often, and read this crap before, read it again.....
(The following was originally posted on March 10th) I don't often
read Cincinnati Magazine. We get it at the station, but I don't think
they're gearing toward me, so beyond checking the Social Datebook to
check for pictures of people I work with, I don't check it out that
much.
Still, as someone who loves to go out to eat, their "Best Restaurants"
issue caught my eye. I read it, and never been more disappointed. Who
eats at these places? I've never heard of half of them, and those I've
heard of have things on the menu I can't pronounce. You tell me what's
better...Boca (#1 on their list) or late night dining at the Anchor
Grill in Covington....something called JeanRo (#6) or the turkey/ham
combo at the Sharonville Root Beer Stand. I gotta think people like
you and I will take the Manhattan Club at the Silverton Cafe over the
rosemary creme caramel candied fennel orange salad, and brioche French
toast they serve at some place called DaVeeds (#10). So, since I'm
exceptionally bored, and left with nothing to do because of the snow,
here are my top ten restaurants for real human beings, as opposed to
those who prefer Orchids at Palm Court's (#3) seared scallop resting
on a puck of green bamboo rice....
10) Aponte's Pizzeria in
Mason (Next to the Mason Pub!)...real New Jersey-style pizza and other
Italian favorites. The dude who owns it is from New Jersey. The
slices are big and greasy, much like girls from Jersey.
9)
Glendale Gaslight in um, Glendale. Three words: Tuesday night
lobster. For $20. While everyone else in Glendale goes to the
supremely overrated Grand Finale, go crush some lobster.
8)
Zip's. Because I like hamburgers. Also, it's fun to watch all the
people jogging in Mt Lookout in their $250 jogging tights while I cram
burgers and beer in my face.
7) Wild Bill's in Lebanon. Best bowl of chili I have ever eaten.
I'm told Wild Bill's closed last weekend. Sad. They really had a
great bowl of chili. Guess that means everyone else moves up a slot,
but I'm lazy so we're gonna just make a new #7....Sugar and
Spice....purely for breakfast. I'm a huge breakfast guy. Omelets,
pancakes, and a pretty long wait for both, but well worth it.
6)
Behle Street Cafe in Covington. I'm partial because I worked there in
college, and because I once nearly got into a fistfight with a drunk
old man before a Britney Spears concert.
4)
Herb and Thelma's in Covington. It's a guy behind a beer-only bar who
cooks two things...1) fried bologna sandwiches and 2) the best burgers
in the area. And the place is the size of a large closet.
3)
Ludlow-Bromley Yacht Club. On Monday's in the summer, there's nothing better
than steak night. For $11, they give you a steak and you cook it
yourself. And they serve beer in cans. Nothing beats eating cow,
drinking beer, and yelling at barges going up and down the Ohio River.
2)
Fratelli's Pizzeria in West Chester. Hands-down the best pizza in the
area. You will swear off all the chains. They get the slight nod over
Aponte's because they have a team photo of the 1986 Mets in the
bathroom.
1) Silver Spring House in Blue Ash. I go there once
a week. They have an extensive menu, yet I've only had one item on it:
baked chicken. Maybe the best thing I have ever put in my mouth.
Plus, it's a great place to drink beer and watch games.
